1st August, 2014

The Twitcher

Well, it had to happen.  After 72 editions of edifying social commentary from your faithful scribe, the Editor is going modern and taking this august publication into the twenty-first century.  Just like that.  Imagine, no more waiting with bated breath for a weekly dose of truth on a skewer (oh alright, fortnightly more recently).  Instead, you can now trip into the same diet of news and commentary daily, nogaal, courtesy of some clever people who opened up Facebook to an unbelieving world.  So that’s the deal, dear readers.  The Editor, not content with changing the world as we know it, is also putting up posters all over the village, offering the option of pointing your smartphone at what looks to me like a bloody enormous bar code, to take you straight to the Clarens News! Eish!  (And I don’t mean the other publication that a few of you sometimes read). As for me, it’s back to the World Bank, economic conferences, negotiating peace in the Middle East, judging Master Chef and inventing wireless electricity.  A fellow has to work, and this lull in my writing duties allows me to return the world stage a wiser but probably less articulate man.  It’s been fun though.  The haunting terror of having Bigfoot (well, Kaalvoet, as it turned out) stonking around the orchards of the village was an immense experience, not least taking the big lady (yes, she was a girl and oh so passionate) to a dance night at Friends.  David Attenborough messing with our ducks was another capital story, and there is an entire generation of feathered friends who nostalgically recall their BBC-crafted transportation across the ponds of Clarens.  Ah, those were the days.   Libel actions, proposals of marriage, beer tasting when the well-water got lumpy and other salutary experiences have brought tears of joy to my squint eyes.  All in the name of Clarens News. Well, it’s over now so you’ll find me on the third barstool from the end at the Brewery.  Unless of course, the Editor relents and asks me back……………… The Twitcher (retired) Editor’s note:  Follow us on facebook.   I’m sure we’ll find a way to sneak an ornithological note in somewhere.